


Warm to the Touch

by Fire18_Soul88



Series: Our home is a space in the darkness [1]
Category: Black Clover - Tabata Yuki (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Black Bulls Squad (Black Clover), Black Bulls Squad as Family (Black Clover), Blood and Injury, Childhood Trauma, Cuddling & Snuggling, Domestic Fluff, Everyone Knows About Henry (Black Clover), Fluff and Angst, Found Family, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, Kinda a 5 and 1, M/M, Pining, Self-Esteem Issues, Touch-Starved, not a oneshot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:47:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27032947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fire18_Soul88/pseuds/Fire18_Soul88
Summary: We need more Black clover content. So here's a series I'm working on.
Relationships: Asta & Finral Roulacase, Black Bulls Ensemble & Finral Roulacase, Finral Roulacase & Luck Voltia, Finral Roulacase & Magna Swing, Finral Roulacase & Noelle Silva, Finral Roulacase & Yami Sukehiro, Finral Roulacase/Yami Sukehiro, Vanessa Enoteca & Finral Roulacase
Series: Our home is a space in the darkness [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1972945
Comments: 12
Kudos: 112





	1. Chapter 1

The House of Vaude was never a loving or touchy place. Affection was never something that was given or received. Finral had never thought about it as a problem, so use to the lack of affection and physical contact -outside of dancing and fighting- and he wasn't going to go around asking for affection. It wasn't important. He's gone so long without it, why would he need it or want it now. 

So yeah, if Finral couldn't remember the last time someone touched him without the intent to hurt him. Then so what. 

\--------------------------------------------------------

Yami wasn't the most affectionate person, and when he was it was usually only a pat on the head, a ruffling of the hair or a hand on the shoulder. He had been on the receiving end of Yami's affection many times. And if each time his head hurt and heart swelled with an unfamiliar emotion, beating faster than it should, then none else would know. ~~Unless Yami was reading his ki, which he prayed he wasn't.~~

So it was safe to say that Finral hadn't a clue to why he reacted the way he did. Why he did he do what he did? I mean he had received affection from Yami before, and later from Vanessa, she was a very affectionate person when she was drunk, clinging to anyone around her, hugging anyone and everyone she could. And if Finral battled with himself not to lean into the _warmth_ and feeling of _home._ Then he was use to faking it, so who noticed. 

The first time Finral hugged Yami, it had been straight after a battle with some forgettable smuggler, so blame it on his adrenaline. He had told Yami that he was going to portal him a foot above the smuggler and once he had fallen through, open another portal below both of them. It was a stupid plan but it was the quickest and most effective they had at the moment. Yami of course had agreed to it with a simple "sounds like fun" and a smug smirk. Finral hated how easily Yami went along with the plan, it was dangerous as the smuggler had placed some sort of poison spell on the area around him, forcing them away from him. It didn't really bother Finral, not wanting to be close to the smuggler anyway, but he had to admit it was making it difficult for them to take him down and made his plan dangerous.

So if Finral was worried about his Captains safety -not that he doubt his fighting ability- then sue him. His worries only increased as he analyzed the type of poison as best he could from as far away as he was, coming to the conclusion that it was cyanide. Quickly, running through the dangers and affects of cyanide poisoning in his head as he waited for Yami's signal was not smartest thing to do to calm his nerves but it did offer him a back up plan incase this didn't work. 

Suddenly Yami gave the signal, forcing his worries down inside him, he quickly began executing his plan. Open the portals as quickly and effectively, as his years of training and honing his skills became clear to anyone who cared to notice. The plan surprising worked. Only seconds after closing the portal behind Yami and smuggler he heard a crash through the roof of the building behind him, causing him to flinch at the noise and pain he imagined the two men were feeling from the fall through a _fucking_ building. 

After hearing no noise coming from the building Yami fell through Finral's worry began building its way through his bones. His lungs struggling to take in oxygen and head beginning to spin as time ticked on with no sign of the Black Bulls Captain. His legs now feeling heavy he walked towards to collapsed building, trying to catch his breath. 

"Yami."

"Yami"

"Yami!" 

Finral didn't bother trying to steady his voice or hide the desperation cracking through his stable voice. He was to busy scanning the area for his Captain, for Yami. Worry completely consuming him, breathing labored, legs heavy and body now cold with fear. 

"Yami!" 

"Yam-"

"Oi, would you stop yelling my name. I'm right here."

The rough voice of his Captain shattered the ice cold worry that had consumed him. Looking through his blurred vision at the rubble to his left he saw Yami pushing the remnants of the building of his body. Wait... _blurred_. Raising a hand to his face while Yami finished clear the rubble of himself, Finral found his cheeks wet, stained with... _tears._ When had he started crying? 

Quickly wiping his face to not seem weak in front of his Captain. Turing back to Yami praying he didn't notice he had been crying, he was stopped short seeing Yami already staring at him, his face unreadable. 

"Your okay?" Finral began to speak his voice shaky and quiet, Finral wasn't sure if he had actually said anything. 

Yami just looked at him and nodded. 

Finral didn't feel better. Something told him he need... something. A vocal answer. Something.. something to make sure his Captain... Yami was okay. Not just a nod, not just the silence. Almost on instinct he walked towards Yami, ignoring the look of confusion from the bigger man Finral wrapped his arms around Yami body. Hugging him. 

It... helped. His body wasn't frozen with worry and his head wasn't dizzy and heart wasn't squeezing painfully in his chest.... it was... _calming_. 

A warm hand gently held the back of his head and another rested on his back. Fingers running through his hair.

It was..... _comfortable_. 

And without a thought he leaned into it. Allowing Yami's warmth to comfort him, to surround him. 

Finral tried to remember the last time he was hugged like this. The last time he felt touch that was gentle without intent to harm, the last time he gave into the warmth of another person. The last time he let himself feel safe and home, a feeling so familiar -it was what Vanessa's hugs made him feel- and yet so new and overwhelming. 

Finral shook his head to clear his thoughts, burying his face into Yami's chest, trying not to think about how warm and gentle the bigger man is. How his hands felt like hot brands on his body, and his fingers running through his hair feeling so calming and.... _nice_ , he knew he was unfamiliar to this kind of physical affection. Especially from Yami. 

Finral knew he had to let go soon but he just.... couldn't. It was nice, overwhelming and just.... _complete._ He had no idea how long they stood like this. How long Yami put up with holding him. But eventually he pulled away, reluctantly. Not wanting to make Yami hold him any longer, he already put up with him enough. So letting Finral hug and... humoring him by holding him in return... was already to much. Stepping away... hoping to make Yami more comfortable after forcefully hugging him. Finral worked on calming down his heart rate and pushing away the overwhelming feelings hugging Yami brought. Looking back at the body of the smuggler they- no.... Yami took down. Ignoring the burning eyes watching him, fearing that if he looked at those eyes he would be met with disgust, anger or heaven forbid... pity

"Wha- What we gonna do with him?" Finral's voice was shaky and unstable when he tried asking at first before trying again, forcing his voice to become stable. 

"No idea. How about you open a portal to the capital magic carpet."" Yami added. 

And suddenly everything was as it was. The world was right again. They would never talk about that moment and Finral would avoid doing it again, trying to forget it ever happened ~~and failing.~~

And if Finral thought about that moment, the emotions that overwhelmed him and how warm, calm and just _right_ it had felt then Yami would never know. 

Could never know. 

Finral didn't need affection, had never needed it before so why would he need it now. He didn’t need it now. And yet why did he want it... why did he want to feel like he was worth it, like he matter... Like someone cared about him. 

Why would he want something so impossible? Something he wasn't deserving of? Something.... he would never get to feel, his life wasn't worth anything bar the necessity the world had for his magic. He wasn't upset about it, he had always known he wasn't deserving of affection... of love and.... all those feeling he had unrightfully felt. 

He just hoped that he didn't allow it to happen again. He couldn't risk this. 

Couldn't risk his home--- no his place in the Black Bulls. 

Couldn't risk what he had worked for. 

He was ungrateful and cowardly but not stupid. 


	2. Please let them be okay

After the situation between him and Yami. Finral had become more careful, avoiding touching Yami for awhile hoping that what had happened between them wouldn't happen again and the feelings that the situation had brought would disappear. But they didn't. They actually got worse. Finral was now more aware of every touch, every graze. Not only between him and Yami but also between him and Vanessa, and.... well every other member of the squad (not that the others were very touchy). Gordon was the only exception, that man was very touchy and kind but even he was effected by..... whatever this is... 

Finral, wasn't sure what was happening to him. He had never been so aware of every moment. He had never felt like every touch he received were brands burning into his skin. Had never felt the need to reach out and just - touch the other members of his squad. To hug Vanessa, to run his hands through her hair, wondering if she would allow him to braid it. To lean into Yami's head pats and hair ruffles. Hell, he struggled to control his desire to hug Gordon whenever he complimented someone or Smile. Or high five Gouche when doubted himself. Or 'bro-hug' Magna whenever he said something that revealed all his self loathing and lack of confidence. ~~It was relatable but it hurt hearing someone else doubt or hate themselves.~~

But the over powering thought of them being disgusted, uncomfortable or even angry at his touch prevented him from reaching out. 

It was stupid.

Pathetic 

Sighing as his thoughts began to spin into that of self loathing. Finral shook his head hoping to clear his thoughts as he walked through the base to the common area for breakfast. 

He shouldn't dwell on it to much, afterall it wasn't that important. 

Arriving in the common area he was greeted with Charmy's heavenly cooking. That women really out does herself to make sure they are all fed. Deciding to lay his thoughts to rest and just eat breakfast, he sat down and began helping himself. The table was already accompanied by Gauche, Grey, Vanessa, Magna and of course Charmy. Gordon wasn't usually up this early, and from the fact he had to walk down an extra two hallways and flight of stairs tells him that Henry was asleep right now (which was probably for the best, he's had a rough couple of days). And with Luck out on a mission, that only left Yami. 

Now Yami slept a lot but he was always one of the first people up in the morning. Unless Henry was up during the night or someone was having a rough night or was tormented by nightmare's many of the Black Bull's were haunted by. So it was surprising to see their Captain absent. So either he went out earlier (which was highly unlikely, as he would have woken Finral to portal him there) or he was still asleep. 

Ignoring it, Finral turned back to his plate and began to eat, allowing himself to listen to the chatter of his squad mates going on around him. Even occasionally offering his input. 

\---------------------------------

It wasn't until about lunch time when Captain Yami finally got hom- got back to base. He arrived back at the base with a piece of paper in hand a smirk on his face on that told Finral he probably wasn't going to like what he had to say. 

"Oi, Vanessa, Magna, Finral over here." 

Sighing at the usual rough, crass way the Captain called them over- Though he really shouldn't have been surprised, Yami's manners haven't really changed the entire time Finral's known him. 

To comfortable to stand up, Finral opened a portal below him and opened it above the bar Yami was leaning against, so he could just land on the bar and didn't have to get up. Yami glared at him for his actions but Finral felt too proud of himself to care about it. Allowing himself to savour Vanessa's proud smile at his actions and Magna's complaints of it being unfair. These acts held no real significance, but they made him feel warm and safe. 

At home.

It was nice. And if he indulged himself in that feeling for longer than he deserved then who had to know. Though, from the familiar, unreadable look Yami was givimg him- the same look he gave that day with the smuggler- then he wasn't the only who knew that he was indulging. He tried to ignore it. He didn't need Yami's pity. Didn't need his disgust at the idea of Finral finding a home here. He tried to ignore how that made him feel . He didn't need to be reminded of how useless it was to get attached, to feel comfortable. He was only worth what his magic brought to the squad. Only as important as how many portals he could open. But it wouldn't be long before they found something better, something that wasn't him. 

He didn't need that. The feeling had long since faded by the time Magna and Vanessa were in front of Yami, as Finral had found himself spiraling into his dark thoughts. Pushing his self loathing to the side he focused on the task at hand. Turning to face Yami from his seat on top of the bar. 

Yami satisfied to have the three' s attention began to explain. 

"So there's a job for you three. Take out a small group of bandits terrorizing a small town, return everything they stole and get paid. The job is relatively simple. Shouldn't take you more than a day. Plus its on the outskirts of Kiten, so Finral should be able to portal there."

Satisfied with what he said, Yami handed the filer to Finral and walked up the stairs towards.... well where ever he was headed. 

The three left behind shared a quick look before heading to their rooms to get what they would need for this mission. 

It was simple just like Yami said, shouldn't take more than a day. 

\---------------------------------

It was suppose to be a simple mission. Finral would go with Vanessa and Magna to a small town on the outskirts of Kiten. It was simple, take down a few bandits and return all they stole from the local villages and towns. Done, dusted. That would be it. 

And yet, surprise, surprise. It wasn't so simple. 

First of all, there were about 20 bandits actual present when they were told there should have only been 12. Furthermore, they weren't low level mages. They were powerful. Not enough to pose a threat to their team when fighting them individually like they were planning to, but they should have been an easy take down if they were fighting in the group of 12. But there were 20 bandits not 12. 

Additionally, they had no back up, having had there communicator back to the Black Bulls base destroyed by the very man who sent for them in the first place. Because as Finral quickly figured out, it was a trap. A set up. The bandits weren't just bandits many of them were towns people that had greeted them earlier that very day. They were a part of this, luring knights and unsuspecting victims in, creating a false sense of security, stealing from them and then getting rid of them so they couldn't tell anyone about the operation. 

Finral had to admit, it was very smart. But he had very little time to think about the detail as he flicked his hand creating a portal below Magna. Moving him just in time to avoid the spell that would have hit him, but instead just hit an empty spot in the town square. Or what was left of it. 

With Magna standing behind him away from the immediate danger, away from the attack that was sure to critically hurt him, Finral felt his nerves relax. Focusing his attention on his surroundings he noticed Vanessa being over whelmed by 5 towns people/bandits. Deciding to give her a hand, he opened a portal below her just like he did Magna, opening it behind him. With his squad mates nearby and safe, he was at peace. 

Which was strange considering he was surrounded by people trying to rob and kill them....

Deciding to think about that later, he pulled his team mates close and began to formulate a plan. 

"We need a plan." 

His senses busy taking in his surroundings Finral didn't so much as see Magna and Vanessa's eyerolls at his statements, as he did just know they had done it. 

"Yeah, no shit. So you got a plan?" Magna's sarcasm was underlined with concern. 

"Part of one, the possibility of it working is... like 30 out of 100" 

"30 out of 100!" 

Magna's horrored screech was predictable but not helpful at the moment. Turning to Vanessa, Finral began upgrading his plan. It still didn't help their chances. 

Sighing, Finral's mind supplied him with a terrifying thought. One that formed a plan against his wishes. 

A plan that held higher chances of succeeding than that of his original plan. 

It didn't help.... it didn't matter. 

Finral was going to go through with said plan. 

It meant abandoning Vanessa and Magna. Granted he would come back, with back up. With the rest of his squad. 

But.... 

He wasn't going to do it. 

Some how sensing his conflict Vanessa spoke up "Whatever is going on in that head of yours Finral, do it! If its going to work. Do it!" 

Magna's mouth snapped shut. Turning towards them, taking them in carefully. 

Finral turned away from Vanessa's unflinching gaze, he sighed. "Vanessa, I can't- No I won't." 

"Dude, if it's gonna work. If it's got a higher chance of working than the 30% plan you had earlier. Then do it" 

Finral opened his mouth to object. Magna held his hand up, as Vanessa put a hand on Finral's shoulder. (The touch led to the burn he had become familiar too, over the last couple of weeks.) 

"We trust you Finral." 

Magna's and Vanessa's voices held no room for argument, steady, unflinching. Matching their gaze as they looked at Finral. Reasurring him of his plan. A plan they didn't know, a plan they had yet to hear. And yet they held so much blind, unflinching trust in him. That thought alone caused a shiver to go down his spine. They held so much trust in him. It was undeserving. He didn't deserve it. 

It terrified him. 

How could they hold that much trust in him? 

In his plan? 

Letting out another sigh, he lowered his head as he finalized his plan. 

Not a second later he raised his head again, smirking at his squad mates. 

"Next time you two choose to gang up on me, mind doing it when we're not in a life threatening situation." 

That granted him two real smiles from his family. 

Family.... 

Finral liked that. 

Smiling back at them, Finral began to tell them his plan. 

They could do this.... 

It scared him.... 

He was worried but they could do this. 

He could do this. He had too. 

He could not betray his teammates trust. 

Couldn't let them down. 

Just...Please.... 

Let them be okay? 


	3. Trust In Friends. Trust In.....Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay so timeline wise, the first 5 chapters in this fic takes place before Asta and Noelle join the squad. The rest of the chapters take place after or during their addition to the Black Bulls.  
> Hope this helps!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter finally deals with Yami's perspective. The next chapter will fully explore his perspective.

Finral would never abandon his squad mate's intentionally no matter how much of a coward he was. He cared to much about them to even have that thought cross his mind. So no matter the danger they were put in he never, ever abandoned them. 

So it wasn't a surprise that he showed delay in leaving his friends behind, even if it was just to get back up to help them take down these criminals. Regardless of the fact that they had talked this over and, Vanessa and Magna had fully trust in him and his plan. He felt like he was indeed abandoning them. 

Swallowing his self-hate and anger at himself, he looked back at the fighting going on around him on last time, Finral opened a portal.   
  
Hating himself for what he was about to do.   
  


Finral steppes through the portal leaving Vanessa and Magna behind. Praying that the rest of the squad were indeed on the other side. 

\-------------------------------------------------

  
Yami was sitting on the couch thinking about the strange things going on with his Spacial Mage. It had been a thing for a long time but it had gotten more prominent after their hug during the smuggler incident. 

Finral had always been strange -granted not as strange as some of the members he had in his squad- but he had his quirks. Most noticeably his aversion to touch. It was a lot better now. The dude doesn’t flinch like someone was gonna hurt him anymore. Nor was he so jumpy or cautious. 

But still Finral wasn’t Vanessa or Magna when it came to touch. He actively avoided it. Never initiated it.

And yet... 

Every time someone did touch him. Hug him. He looked so at peace. His Ki screamed with affection and just.... safe. 

It was strange. But not as strange as his actions that day with the smuggler. Finral looked so scared, his voice was cracking with desperation and concern. His Ki indicated he was worried, scared... hell Yami was sure he saw him crying. 

Yami was starting to realise that though he seemed pretty normal on the surface, Finral really was the strangest of them all. 

A real Enigma. 

Laughing to himself, Yami began to let him mind wander. Forgetting about Finral, deciding he could figure the Spacial Mage out later. That was until suddenly the mana increased in the usual corner Finral opened his portals in. 

As Finral stepped out one off his portals at the very moment. Alone and looking like hell. Suddenly painfully aware of the situation at hand. Yami began to take in the man before him. 

His increased heart rate

Multiple injuries. From burns, to poison marks. Hell even a few stab wounds. 

Finrals Ki however stood out the most. It was screaming out in pain, fear, frustration and anxiety. But underlining all of that was concern. 

“Finral.” 

Said man flinched before turning towards him and opening his mouth to speak. Words tumbling, quickly and shaking with panic. 

”Long story. But the towns people were the bandits and we are really out numbered- and the man who put the ad up destroyed my communicator- so I couldn’t call and ask for help. I could not get help. So- so I left, I left and I came to get you. and so Magna and Vanessa are still back there and the longer we wait the more time we are wasting, and I already abandoned them, I’d rather not get them killed too. So can we go?” 

Well... 

Okay... 

That was a lot. Deciding to deal with Finral’s obvious self esteem issues later that was leaking into his concerned rambling. Yami yelled as loud as he could. 

”Oi brats. Vanessa, Magna and Finral need our help. Now get down here and let’s go. The longer we wait the more danger they could be in!” 

And not 3 seconds later Gauche, Grey, Charmy and Henry had joined them. 

Nodding towards Finral, who opened another portal for the 5 of them to step through- as Henry couldn’t come but he had began organising First Aid equipment for when they came back. 

And from the looks of Finral they were definitely going to need it. 


	4. Love and Affection.... All you have to do is ask

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter switches between Finral and Yami's perspectives. But this chapter they don't talk about the stuff they should be.

  
Finral was surprised at how easily they had dealt with the bandits with Yami and the rest of the squads help. They had the bandits taken down, restrained and reinforcement called all, in 15 minutes, with minor injuries bar what Magna, Vanessa and Finral had sustained before the others arrived. So now with all the carnage around him Finral finally had a moment to breath, a moment to fully process his thoughts. 

With Vanessa and Magna already back at the base undoubtedly getting patched up by Henry and Charmy, Finral began to survey the damages done and the whole point of... this. 

The whole reason those villagers did this. They reason they stole and murdered innocents, simply for their own gain. It may have seemed inhumane and selfish, and it probably was. But if you took a closer look you'd see how many of the towns people had just went along with what was happening, or had no other choice. many had children, many were obviously scared of their apparent 'leader'. A 'leader' who wasn't here at the present time and would probably not be coming back. 

Finral was annoyed at that very fact. 

What apparent leader would abandon his comrades? Who would do such a thing? 

Who would do any of this in the first place? Why? 

Finral never understood why people hurt others, why they caused others pain and suffering. How could they live with themselves, with that guilt.... with that blood on their hands. He didn't understand why? It scared him. These types of people, like many of the people before him, like the leader who was no show.... hell, even his parents. They all had hurt people for reasons that seemed so inhumane to him. Greed. Power. Control. 

It infuriated him. 

"Oi, magic carpet. You good? You done staring angrily at the towns people, your looking scarier than me. It really doesn't suit you." 

Snapped out from his anger, he turned to Yami to find a strange look on his face -if he was more delusional, he would have placed it for concern but he wasn't. 

"I was thinking."

"I gathered. But you didn't have to look like you wanted to murder all these villagers, yay big pacifist!" 

Not taking the bait Yami had laid for him, Finral changed the subject instead. 

"Do you think we'll find their apparent leader?" 

Another strange look passed the Captains usually passive, blank expression. 

"We probably won't." 

....

..........

..............

Suddenly, heat and anger consumed Finral. His fists and teeth clenched. Eyes narrowing as he looked away from Yami towards some rubble that was once a church. He hated this feeling, but it wasn't fair. That man, women, non-binary person had HURT so many people, they/he/she couldn't just get away with it. They couldn't hurt so many people, and walk away reaping the rewards, as other people suffered and were punished.

The anger was building, climbing faster, consuming him. He hated this. 

He faintly heard a sigh come from beside him. 

From Yami. 

\------------------------------------------

Yami understood why and how his statement made Finral angry, but that didn't stop the shock that he felt the extent of his anger. It was overwhelming and surprising for Finral, the dorky, protective, loyal pacifist of the Black Bulls. The anger was clear even if you couldn't sense his aura, it was clear. In his clenched fists, heavy breathing, narrowing eyes turned away from him. In his hunched shoulders and the tension leaking of his Spatial mage. 

Sighing, Yami pulled out a cigarette and lit it. He understood Finral's anger, the bastard had hurt so many people, tortured, murdered and stole from innocent people just looking for help. Hell, many of his comrades had been killed by that bastard. 

He couldn't just get away with it but statistically he knew that it was worthless, the bastard would get away with it. 

They would never be able to find him and if they did, they had very little evidence that would stick. 

Blowing out the smoke from his cigarette, Yami took a step forward, towards Finral. 

"There's nothing we can do about it, ya know." 

Silence answered him.

Fighting back another sigh. Shit he had been doing that a lot lately. 

Reaching out Yami placed his hand on Finral's shoulder, he began again. 

"Finral, look at me. Finral, please. Look at me." The narrowed purple eyes of his spatial mage met his. "Okay. Good. Now listen to me, Listen to me clearly. Okay, Finral." 

A nervous nod and shaky swallowed breath answered him. 

So he continued, "Finral, this, all of this. You can't control it. Its out of your control. That bastard where ever they are will pay for it. Whether indirectly or directly. He will pay for it. And I promise you this, if not anything else. They wouldn't hurt anyone else, ever. Non of them will." 

"But please, you did everything you could. We all did. You might not believe me, but trust me, you did everything you could.....

I'm proud of you, Finral-" 

A sharp intake of breath and blown wide pupils took over the mages face, in front of him. 

"- You did well today. You got help, you protected your squad mates. You did well, okay..... Got that, okay?" 

Another nod. 

"No. No, you gotta use your voice this time Finral." 

He didn't know why he said that, he just needed to hear it. Hear the response. Just needed to hear his voice..

To know he had listened? 

Fuck. Yami's emotions were a mess.

But this- No, Finral was more important. 

"Ye-yeah. Yeah- I he-hear you." 

A sharp swallow and outtake of breath. 

A shaky smile, not quite there and definitely not convincing. But it was there and that- that was enough. 

"Loud and clear, Captain." 

"Good, now come'on. Lets get back home, the others are waiting."

Yami tapped Finrals shoulder and turned towards the open portal back to base. He didn't need to turn around, Finral would follow. Just give him a minute. But when he was ready, his family, the Bulls would be there waiting for him. 

Yami would be right beside them, waiting for Finral to come home. 


	5. I Will Look Out For You, My Dear. While You Look Out For Me.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Takes place before the underwater temple and contains some Finral Angst. The next two chapters will contain lots and lots of Finral Angst but enjoy this angst first.

Finral was no stranger to injury, nor was he a unfamiliar with patching up said injuries, he's patched up Vanessa, Luck, Magna and Yami enough times to know his way around burns, fractures cuts and bruises. However, just because he was good at patching up other peoples injuries mid-battle, after battle and after a rowdy night out drinking, did not mean he knew how to patch himself up- well he did know how he just left it to last minute, always helping others first. Stupid, maybe. Self-sacrificial, absolutely. Was he gonna stop? Nah. 

All of this however, was not how he ended up in this position, no matter what Yami thought. Finral was self-sacrificing and loyal to a fault but he wouldn't actively put himself into to danger, not else he had to. And by that, it was usually to help or protect innocent civilians or his squad mates. He didn't just throw himself in-front of powerful and dangerous spells willy-nilly. He wasn't Yami. 

So Yeah. 

How did he end up here? 

Leaning against the rumble of the wall of the house he just fell threw, a gaping wounds playing connect the dots on his abdomen and, his left leg and collarbone fractured severely. Bruises and cuts littering his body from his enemies knife and fist. Sweat painting his forehead and dripping into the cuts on his eyebrow and cheek. Finral had no doubt that he looked a mess, but he was to dizzy and exhausted to care about his appearance at the moment. Finrals, vision had blurred the moment he had stood up and the pain in his leg forced him to lean against the wall to avoid putting weight on his damaged leg. His head pounding painfully and breathing was becoming more labored every second he was standing- if you could call it standing. Not only that but his leg that had been damaged, had no feeling in it. Which was a tell tale sign that he had obstructed the blood flow to his limb and therefore his leg was receiving no oxygen. Something that would become a major problem if he didn't reestablish blood flow. He had no clue how long he had been out as the construct of time seemed to difficult to understand at the moment, but something told him it was probably no more than a few minutes. But even that thought scared him ad it meant he could have to sustained some form of head injury or a concussion. Wait... where was the man he had been fighting. 

Scanning the area quickly Finral could not find any of his squad mates. He did find however, the man responsible for all his injuries and his fall through the building. The man himself wasn't significantly scary nor was he intimidating, he was sickly pale, with large eyebags - that could rival his own when he did extra jobs or stayed up late doing the paperwork Yami refused to do- tall but thin and stalky, almost like a string bean. He had a ruffled mop of blondish stuff on his head that couldn't even begin to classify as hair, he had a bust lip from fall on his face when Finral sent him through a portal and a black eye from a punch Finral had reluctantly thrown when he had tried to slit his throat. No, non of this was scary to Finral, he had seem worse and had been threaten with worse by his own Captain -though Yami's threats were empty and held no solid ground, and he mostly said them to keep face or an attempt at a strange kind of affection, but they were threats non the less, even though non of the Bulls were deterred by them anymore. 

No what was truly terrifying about this string bean like man was the magic he used and how effective he was with a blade. The man could throw and stab people with the same efficiency Finral opened portals. His magic wasn't all that interesting or effective in combat, but the man before him had found a way to intergrade his fighting style with his magic, making him pretty fucking scary. It's also pretty cool but he had no time to give the string man compliments, he was to busy dodging blades and mana attacks. To busy opening and closing portals both in hopes to stop and redirect the attacks thrown at him, and trap the man throwing those very attacks at him. The first was pretty effective. The second only worked a few times, before the man seemed to change his fighting style to avoid falling on his face again. 

The man had not seemed to notice Finral was leaning against what was left of the wall on the front of the house -if it was a house- nor did he seem to care whether he had survived the stabbing of his blade and the fall through the building he had thrown the spatial mage down into. The man had his back turned to Finral and was shouting to someone, even though Finral couldn't see any of the man's comrades anywhere in the area, but his sight was failing him with the world going dark for a few seconds every couple of minutes. 

Leaning more of his weight on the wall, Finral closed his eyes and, focused on trying to stabilize his breathing and wait for his sight to clear up. 

After a few successful minutes of stable breathing, Finral finally opened his eyes and found the man standing where he was before, his mana spiking drastically and it was showing no times of stopping. Suddenly, aware Finral pushed himself of the wall, completely ungraceful might he add, but none was there to see him. Walking as best he could with his broken and busted leg, he began to see and piece together what the mage was trying to do, granted he didn't know what spell he was trying to do, only that it wouldn't be good for him or his squad mates. 

Finral was pretty sure the mage was trying to do some sort of spell that would effect anyone he deem as a threat or....maybe the spell he was planning on doing would affect everyone which might have been why he was arguing with someone only minutes earlier- if he even was arguing with the other person he was talking to. If he was even talking to someone. 

Finral was struggling to make sense of what made sense? he didn't know what he was doing. His head was throbbing with extreme pain and his vision was now completely blurred. He was unable to focus on the task at hand. He knew supposed what he was to be doing, but he didn't know what it actually was and why he was to do it. 

The mana spiked again, making him dizzier and more unfocused than he already was, but it did wake him up out of confusion that had clouded his thoughts. Only for a moment had that cloud cleared. Finral now with mere seconds of clarity formed a half baked and definitely dangerous plan. Taking a quick breath of air Finral prepared himself for the pretty stupid plan he had formed. One that was no doubt to get him killed either by his enemy or his own squad, especially his Captain. If he was to survive this. 

With this plan in mind, Finral pushed his doubts to the side. And then threw himself at the mage in front of him. Finral opened a quick portal to a frozen tundra well away from his squad mates and the rest of clover, and sent the man through. Finral jumping back just in time to miss falling through the portal himself. With nothing to balance himself, Finral fell on his ass. Pushing all other concerns aside he began working on catching his breath and allow himself to relax- well relax the best he could with the injuries he had. 

Finral was so exhausted and in pain. So distracted getting his breathing under control. So dizzy from the fall through that building and all the injuries from the mages blade that he was far too out of it, that he did not realize that he had accidently set off a trap that the mage had sent up for if someone touched him. 

No, Finral had no clue what he done. No realisation of the trap magic he understood almost better that his own, spatial magic, and so he was impossibly blind to the trap that was sure kill by dozens of the other mages, A trap that would shoot up blades from the ground below him. Sure to skewer him like a bunch of needles to fabric, sure to kill him with ease. But Finral was to distracted to see or sense this spell, to busy breathing and recovering his sight, to busy keeping himself conscious to notice his impending death. 

And so the sharp blades began rising from the ground all around him, starting to the left and right of him. Hoping to cut his escape off and if Finral didn't snap out of it soon he was dead. The ground directly below the Black Bulls spatial mage spiked with mana as the blades began flying up out of the ground hitting said spatial mage----

Or at least the blades **should** have pierced him like a needle cushion. 

But mere seconds before they hit Finral, an muscular arm wrapped around the spatial mages waist and pulled him out of the blast zone. 

The arm cradled Finral against the chest of the person it was attached to.

An action so tender and warm, like he meant something.

Like he was important. 

The hold in itself was intimate, so close to a bridal carry that if Finral was in his right mind he would have flailed. 

He probably would have blushed, and questioned it. 

But he didn't. 

Finral had not yet snapped out of the trance of pain and focus the on breathing, staying conscious and waiting for his sight to recover that he hadn't noticed what had happened. At least until the person who had saved him landed them on a building far from the area Finral and his enemy were fighting. 

Suddenly, aware of being held -princess/bridal style might he add- Finral, squinted up at a the tall figure. His vision was still blurry but he could make out the face, dark eyes, black ruffled hair, unshaven beard and honey skin. 

Finral knew that face. 

He knew it. 

And not much later after looking up at the figure had he realized who was holding him, who had saved him. 

.....

.....

.....

"Ya-m...i" 


	6. Oh My Dear, Thou I Cry, I Am Mad That, That Was Almost Our Goodbye.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soft and angry Yami. Finral has given Yami a few scares throughout they're 'relationship', whatever that is at the moment. With this chapter containing a few of incidents that nearly took the spatial mages life and Yami has never forgotten.  
> Also this Fic is inspired by the song: Starlight by Jai Wolf (thought I'd tell you, cause I love that song, just don't question it).

Yami has experienced death and loss before, he spent a lot of time on the front lines during the war against the diamonds. But that didn't make it any easier. He had seen children too young to be so lifeless, women, men and gender non-conforming individuals dead, and many injured so severely that he heard them plead to be dead. It was terrifying. And it was the past, it wasn't the Black Bulls. It wasn't his newfound group of misfits, his family. So it was so strange, so terrifying. With concern and absolute horror raking his body, Yami slid done the wall outside the makeshift OR that Owen and the other medical staff on his team had set up. The pale, limp, lifelessness shouldn't be here.

Especially now.

Especially not on him. 

Finral.

Shit.

Finral-

The younger mage shouldn't have looked like that, bloody, bruised and limp in his arms, completely out of it that if he didn't swoop in and save him, he would have been dead. The spatial mage shouldn't look so... dead. 

Shit.... 

He had nearly died today. 

Now didn't that thought make his body go cold, his heart stutter and his world.... just stopped. It terrified him, he couldn't. No he wouldn't live without the spatial mage. 

Finral, meant to much to him- to them. To the rest of the Bulls-

Fuck. 

The Black Bulls.

His squad. 

They were all safe, that he knew. With Magna and Luck in the room down the hall, passed out, exhausted and with a couple of broken bones. Noelle and Grey, cuddling across a few chairs beside a bed that contains a magna drained Gauche. Vanessa, Gordon and Charmy were all still out in the field, either helping rebuild city defences or rescuing those still in the destroyed part of the city or rebuilding said destroyed parts of the city. 

Henry was back at home- back at home, that was a nice thought. _Home_. It felt nice, nice because it was true, Yami had a home-. Finral had insisted that he stay home, saying that he had no right to push himself especially after the physically bad days he had been having. Finral had physically pushed him down, face angry and full of concern. None had the heart to speak up and address what the spatial mage had said. Finral, sat Henry down and said if he moved the base and followed him then would portal both of them -Henry and the base- into a tundra, or a mountain until the mission was done. His voice held no room for arguments and even Yami would not dare disobey that order, not with the tone pretty spatial mage had used. 

It was kinda impressive, if Yami was being honest. ~~And it was also kinda hot.~~

Asta and his Golden Dawn buddy were asleep as they had both had surgery, apparently due to broken limbs and intense bleeding. He was seriously gonna need to talk to that boy about watching out for himself and being more careful. Or maybe Finral would do it. Finral was better at that type of thing, better at talking and explaining things.

_Fuck, Finral._

The Black Bulls spatial mage who cared so much and so deeply. About his squad, about his brother. _Hell_ , he cared about just everyone. The person who protected and watched the Black Bulls backs, he was one of the most reliable people Yami knew. Loyal, was definitely one word he would use to describe the resident spatial mage. He was compassionate, kind, loyal (he already said that- **thought that?** ) and just.... he was perceived as the one and only normal member of the squad. But he _wasn't_. Not really. That Yami knew from experience, he knew how that beautiful bastard tried to appear normal **-** As normal as he could be in a squad like Yami's- and he had fooled Yami for quite awhile, but he figured it out eventually. Saw who fucking strange the pretty boy was, but that didn't dispose of the loyalty and reliability that was part of Finral. 

He was a member of his squad, he wore the crest Yami designed over his chest. Over his heart. He was a member of his squad and Yami would not bare to loss him. 

Sitting on the floor, Yami fought the urge to light a cigarette and waited. 

Trying not to think of the lifeless body that he carried in his arms. Ignoring the imagines and thoughts about how close he had been to losing one of the only things that mattered to him. 

_He could have lost **him.** _

And it's not the only **fucking** time he's nearly lost him. 

**He**.... 

Won't keep doing this. He can't keep nearly losing **him**. 

_Not now._

Not fucking ever. 

Especially if he could help it. Stop it.

\-------------------------------------------------------

The first time he nearly lost Finral was a little while after the spatial mage joined his squad. He remembered it even now.... even after nearly five more similar experiences. Five... That was too many near death experiences for one person. Especially someone like Finral. 

The first time he didn't care as much, he didn't feel like he does now. With his body leaning against a wall, bones and skin, cold and his heart heavy. Stuttering through each painful beat. No the first time was terrifying but it wasn't as bad as it was now. The first time.....

When Finral had joined the Black Bulls, he had been the first one Yami had raised his hand and picked. He was small, underweight and an obvious insomniac from the dark bags under his eyes. His mana was strong and steady, and he was fully capable of so much. And yet he didn't fight, not that he didn't know how. But rather he refused too. The boy was clearly physically capable of fighting, if his muscles and watchful eyes on the other fighters were any indication. He had set off Yami's radar the moment he walked in, his Ki was everywhere, anxiety and pain rolling off him in waves. He also didn't have a second name or an address. At least at that point. But now.... now he did. Now he was _Finral Roulacase_ of the Black Bulls now, then he was a runaway noble, Vaude with no home. 

But that didn't explain the possible pacifism that the boy held. Yami knew many people who refused to fight either because they had been fighting for so long, too long, longer than anyone should. With the people, young, old, noble, commoner; many fighting in some way or another throughout their life. Another reason was that they didn't wish to harm anyone, not like how they had been hurt themselves, over and over again. Too many times. There were probably so many other reasons people didn't fight but right now he didn't care. There was an enigma in front of him. But he knew that the reasons weren't his to know, _not yet_. And defiantly no here. 

The examinations were eventually over and now the squads would pick from the people one at time, with a raise of a hand when each persons number was called. 

Yami knew he was defiantly picking that spatial mage. 

_And so he did....._

_......And here they were._

His back pressed against the wall, eyes shut as he forced himself to hope, to pray that his spatial mage was okay. 

_Would be okay._

~~~

Yami soon learned that the spatial mages name was Finral Roulacase, or at least that's what he called himself. And that he was indeed a pacifist. The magic carpet was also incredibly quick, effective and accurate in his portals. He couldn't open to many portals at once and he was drawn back by the fact that he has to have seen the place he wished to open a portal to. However, he had a feeling that the boy had a way round that draw back, much like he did his hatred for violence and fighting. Which was strange for a magic knight... but hey as long as he was part of the Bulls, Yami didn't care much for the pacifism. 

Yami had also come to understand that though the boy flirted with many women, he did so with men and gender non-conforming people too. The brunette was also socially awkward, nervous, hardworking and dangerously loyal. The others loved him. Vanessa drank with him. Though the spatial mage would always hand Yami or any sober member of the Bulls his grimore, something he didn't understand until he witnessed how dangerous a drunk Finral portalling was. Charmy cooked with him and for him. Henry played games and gambled with him. 

(And over time the Bulls gained new members. And over time Finral became important not just to him but to the others. They would rely on him, confide in him and he would protect them. He watched their backs and he would take care of them. Finral was important.

He was so fucking important to the Black Bulls.

Noelle would confide in him about her insecurities and her families bullying.

Gordon would talk to him about his new art project or a new book he was reading. 

Grey would cuddle him and seek advice from him.

Gauche would chat with him about his sister, even asking him for his opinion on what to get her.

Asta would speak to him about his ambitions and his past.

Luck would train with him.

Magna would go on nights out with him. 

Vanessa would cuddle and drink with him.

And Yami....

Yami was his Captain but....

He was also his friend. 

Yami teased him and joked around with him- too which Finral would tease and joke with him in retaliation-

Yami would fight along side him and they would watch each others backs, pulling each other out of danger. 

They were a team. A duo. 

A squad.,,,

....A Family. ) 

And time flew by. But about two months into Finrals recruitment to the Bulls, Yami took him on his first mission. And that was the first time Finral nearly died....

...All because of him. 


End file.
